So Hugh Grant has allegedly attacked a photographer with a plastic container of baked beans. BAKED BEANS!! Surely someone of Hugh’s background would have had a container of petit pois or haricot vert? After all – he did go to Cambridge. Could never have happened in the old days. I mean – baked beans for goodness sake! Is this a sign of our classless society? OK, baked beans are fine; but you don’t talk about having baked beans in the house, let alone show them in public, do you? What self-respecting host of any standing in society would admit to having baked beans in the house, (as if that wasn’t bad enough), AND storing the leftovers IN A PLASTIC BOX? And then display them in public? This does bring into question his background and upbringing – very bad form for someone who’s great-great-grandfather was an assistant to David Livingstone the explorer. Bet he didn’t go around waving baked beans at natives on his expeditions.
So my dear friend Bush and his cabal want to plant missile installations in the Czech republic and Poland. Seeing as both countries are part of the European Union, can they do that without permission of the E.U.? I hope not, and I hope and pray the E.U. says no, although it seems unlikely. No doubt NATO won’t do much either. The American government, (NOT the people), is a juggernaut in the sense as instilled by Christian missionaries during the British Raj. The real juggernaut is an annual procession of chariots carrying images of the god Krishna. The missionaries spread the rumour that followers would throw themselves under the wheels in order to achieve salvation. Now many world governments and leaders like to throw themselves, (figuratively speaking), beneath the wheels of Bush’s juggernaut in the hope of eternal salvation and a chance to bask in the glorious warmth of his beneficence. If you’re a follower or devotee of him and his gang, and choose to walk behind rather than get crushed – make damned sure you wear sunglasses.
Thank someone’s God for Sheryl Crowe the singer. She has come up with a way to help the environment! Our world would be in serious trouble if it was not for the likes of her. So, what’s the idea? Only one sheet of toilet paper per visit to the loo – exceptional circumstances you may use 2. It was a joke; but think about it – the average American uses around 100 roll per year. 100 rolls? What the hell are you doing with it? A serious bowel problem maybe? Used for other purposes such as blowing your nose, cleaning your glasses? The British aren’t much better – they spend an average of £11 billion, (₤22 billion), a year on such creature comforts. Fascinating history too - before the British Perforated Paper Company brought out its first soft bog roll in about 1850, many methods were used. Moslems were advised to use 3 stones, (DON’T ask me why 3 or what type of stone), corn cobs were used until the early 20th century. Chinese emperors in the 14th century used a sheet of toilet paper 2x3 feet, (that’s one hell of a big piece! Should have lasted for days). The US troops even used toilet paper to disguise their tanks during the Gulf War. Again, don’t ask how or why! Last devastatingly interesting fact – the Pentagon uses on average 666 rolls a day. Now that figure is significant – 666 is the mark of the devil.
Last Monday was St. George’s Day, the patron saint of England. St. George slaying the dragon also happens to feature on the seal of Moscow. In fact, it features in the folklore of many countries. True, the Chinese seem to have made this mythical creature their own – a friendly guy, unlike the fearful animal elsewhere. Still, how come it does feature so largely in folklore? No, I don’t have the answer – maybe one of my learned readers does.
See ya.
So my dear friend Bush and his cabal want to plant missile installations in the Czech republic and Poland. Seeing as both countries are part of the European Union, can they do that without permission of the E.U.? I hope not, and I hope and pray the E.U. says no, although it seems unlikely. No doubt NATO won’t do much either. The American government, (NOT the people), is a juggernaut in the sense as instilled by Christian missionaries during the British Raj. The real juggernaut is an annual procession of chariots carrying images of the god Krishna. The missionaries spread the rumour that followers would throw themselves under the wheels in order to achieve salvation. Now many world governments and leaders like to throw themselves, (figuratively speaking), beneath the wheels of Bush’s juggernaut in the hope of eternal salvation and a chance to bask in the glorious warmth of his beneficence. If you’re a follower or devotee of him and his gang, and choose to walk behind rather than get crushed – make damned sure you wear sunglasses.
Thank someone’s God for Sheryl Crowe the singer. She has come up with a way to help the environment! Our world would be in serious trouble if it was not for the likes of her. So, what’s the idea? Only one sheet of toilet paper per visit to the loo – exceptional circumstances you may use 2. It was a joke; but think about it – the average American uses around 100 roll per year. 100 rolls? What the hell are you doing with it? A serious bowel problem maybe? Used for other purposes such as blowing your nose, cleaning your glasses? The British aren’t much better – they spend an average of £11 billion, (₤22 billion), a year on such creature comforts. Fascinating history too - before the British Perforated Paper Company brought out its first soft bog roll in about 1850, many methods were used. Moslems were advised to use 3 stones, (DON’T ask me why 3 or what type of stone), corn cobs were used until the early 20th century. Chinese emperors in the 14th century used a sheet of toilet paper 2x3 feet, (that’s one hell of a big piece! Should have lasted for days). The US troops even used toilet paper to disguise their tanks during the Gulf War. Again, don’t ask how or why! Last devastatingly interesting fact – the Pentagon uses on average 666 rolls a day. Now that figure is significant – 666 is the mark of the devil.
Last Monday was St. George’s Day, the patron saint of England. St. George slaying the dragon also happens to feature on the seal of Moscow. In fact, it features in the folklore of many countries. True, the Chinese seem to have made this mythical creature their own – a friendly guy, unlike the fearful animal elsewhere. Still, how come it does feature so largely in folklore? No, I don’t have the answer – maybe one of my learned readers does.
See ya.
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